It’s less 100 days until the people’s team, the Canberra Raiders, take the field in a meaningful game.
We know. Too long.
So we’ve been thinking about what we can do in the meantime to get us until that wonderful day in early March.
1. Drink and be merry.
I mean it’s the season right? Nothing makes time disappear like alcohol. And food. Eat the food. Let new year’s you worry about the repercussions.
(Ed note: please drink responsibly…)
2. Recreate BJ Leilua’s flick pass to John Bateman
You’ll need a mate, and four people you want to embarrass on a national stage but it could be fun.
3. Build that pizza oven you always said you would
Actually that feels a bit ambitious.
4. Start building that pizza oven you always said you would
At the very least it will give you a nice hard surface to sleep on when your partner makes you sleep outside because you won’t stop talking about how Josh Papalii ran over Damian Cook to score a try to win the preliminary final right in front of you.
5. Be like Sia Soliola
Be the hero your community needs. Volunteer. Donate to a charity. Run as hard as you can into a pack of people.
6. Spend time with your family
Whether they want to spend time with you is another thing, but if they do, that’s rad and you should hang out with them a bit.
7. Think about Josh Papalii running over Damian Cook to win the prelim right in front of me.
I’ve done this one a bunch. Can recommend. Just be careful that you ration who you mention it to a bit.
8. Watch the cricket.
The cool thing about cricket is it takes five days. There’s still 3 tests to go this summer so bang, I’ve just knocked 15 days off for you.
9. Think about Gary Belcher’s moustache
The best ever. Bring it back Badge!
10. Watch the ‘89, ‘90, and ‘94 grand finals.
But not the ‘87, ‘90, or ‘19 versions. It’s still too soon.
11. Miss Jordan Rapana
12. Have absolutely pointless debates about what the Raiders 1-17 will look like
There’s no point. It never looks like what you think it will look like. And when it takes shape, you’ll be embarrassed that you thought Elliot Whitehead will play lock. I mean or so I’ve heard.
14. Wonder what Sticky does in his down time.
Between running the Raiders, his charity work, and spending time with his family, what do you reckon he does when he has a quiet moment? Do you reckon he ever pours himself a big whisky, puts on Simply the Best and thinks “yeah, I was one of the best”.
15. Do your preseason prep.
Practice sitting. Get that remote throwing elbow ready. Practice yelling “get em back” and “are they painted on sir”. Loosen up the shoulders for the Viking clap. We’ve all got to be ready to go in 2020.
There’s less than 100 days.