Fuck this and fuck it and fuck this fucking season.
I dunno man. Maybe this season is just cursed. Just when the Raiders got healthy. Just when they got their Achilles fucking leg fixed, it all comes crashing down. Healthy. Unhealthy. Healthy. Unhealthy. The pendulum of the season swings back.
Noah Martin is out for this week. At least. So is Hudson Young in case you didn’t already remember. Owen Pattie is out suspended too. Just when Canberra got healthy, just when Coach Stuart was celebrating not having to play people out of position, or people not ready for the job, he’s back having to do exactly that.
The report from the club is that it’s a quadricep injury. There’s no word on severity, but I know what we’re all hoping. I also know what we’re all worried about. I hope it’s just a week thing, but on that info, the juice from NRL Physio is that it could be one week, it could be six. We just don’t know. My stomach knows.
It upsets the applecart in the worst way. Martin and Young playing backrow was critical because it meant that Zac Hosking didn’t have to play backrow. It meant that Matty Nicholson, with barely a minute of football to his name over the last 12 months, wouldn’t have to play big minutes. It meant that Morgan Smithies didn’t actually have to play, or some young middle didn’t have to get cold sitting on a bench untrusted by Coach Stuart.
And now all those things are happening. Canberra’s season nearly ended through the middle third of the year because they didn’t have enough forwards. Now they don’t have enough forwards again. There’s no way Matty Nicholson can get through 80 minutes defending the Tigers’ most effective attacking weapon (Samuela Fainu). Vena Patuki-Case will be the kid watching the game from the best seats. And Morgan Smithies, an admirable toiler and a good defender, will be asked to become the facsimile of the dynamic Hosking. Not bloody likely.
As we wrote in the Rumble, this game is critical for the Raiders. They must win. This makes it harder. Much harder. Their strengths in the middle are being depleted. Their weapons on the edge are now nothing but questions and uncertainty. There is a way forward, but the pathway is crumbling and rocks are tumbling from the mountain.
We must remind ourselves that the Milk can hardly complain about the situation – the Tigers implosion is much worse. But at least the Tigers are able to choose who they are leaving out. For a blissful week or so the Raiders could choose from most of their squad. Now they’re back to the mid-season dance of trying to put together a side from a paperclip, an avocado, and the dreams of our fathers.
So I dunno. Maybe they can still win. Maybe Noah is only out for a week, and we get pleasantly surprised by Matty Nicholson’s fitness, Morgan Smithies perspicacity, or Vena Patuki-Case’s handsome visage sitting on the bench. Maybe Daine Laurie turns 15 minute cameos at 13 to a longer stint and a reason to believe.
I’m clutching, man. I’m clutching because I’m done with fighting the same problems. Over and over again. Putting the same puzzle together without the right pieces, hoping this time it will reveal the longship. We keep looking at the box. We know what it’s meant to look like. It’s not like this.
I guess they keep pushing the rock. The hill feels steeper. But all you can do is push. At some point though, the knees will buckle, the shoulders will wane. And there’ll be no one left to help.
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