Stats That Show Why New Zealand Will Lose The World Cup Final.


So I got given the job at the Sportress of writing a piece for this weekend’s World Cup Final.  Of course New Zealand are favourites.  In the last 36 games between the two teams the Wallabies have only been victorious 6 times (I felt that was actually pretty good for the Wallabies).  And over those 36 games the All Blacks have won the Bledisloe Cup 13 consecutive times.  But I wanted to find some more in depth stats that might show the real standing of these two teams as they go head to head this Sunday.

Unfortunately our head statistician at the Sportress, Dr Herman, had just gone on leave this week with his wife about to give birth.  So we had our new intern Dweezele compile some stats for us that were quite amazing.  While Dweezele had a fairly unorthodox approach to data collection his graph clearly shows Wallabies fans should be optimistic about their chances.


Pretty conclusive right.  Let’s unpack the stats further.

Rank 1 – Australian Cricket Team

Dweezele correctly counted New Zealand’s recent win over Australia’s PM’s XI as their most recent performance against Australia.  That leaves Australia’s dominant victory in the World Cup Final as their second last performance and gives them the number 1 ranking.  Dweezele was unable to find out if runs in cricket were equal to points in Rugby.  Sportress is investigating further.

Rank 2 – New Zealand Cricket Team

They made the world cup final.  Pretty rad effort.

Rank 3 – Australian Boomers

Andrew Bogut, Patty Mills, Matt “Sneaky” Dellavadova, Dante Exum, Joe Ingles.  This team is packed with NBA stars.  Ranked 3 and based on Dweezele’s stats a clear lock for Bronze at next years Olympic Games.

Rank 4 – NZ Tall Blacks

Great name.  Sportress is investigating inflated ranking due to reports rings were not regulation size in their “Second most recent performance”.  Watch this space.

Rank 5 – Wallabies

The mighty Wallabies.  Scored a very convincing 27 points as they defeated the All Blacks at Stadium Australia on August 8th.  Probably should be 3rd or 4th pending the “Sportress Ring Investigation” surrounding the Tall Blacks.

Rank 6 – All Blacks

All the way down at 6th the All Blacks are clearly vulnerable in 2015 based on “Second most recent performances against Australia”.  Only ahead of hockey teams.  Enough said.

Rank 7 and 8 – Kookaburras and Black Sticks.  Hockey.  Pffff.  Accurately represented on the graph.

Dweezele, who is a passionate Wallabies supporter, was unable to compile a graph based on MOST recent performances between Australia and New Zealand in 2015 but I’m sure it’s much the same.

Carn the Wallabies!

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