BY DAN

The Canberra Raiders 34-16 loss to the North Queensland Cowboys was a exercise in idiocy. They were beaten by the opposition and themselves, but only one of those two was left lying drunk on the ground, passed out and covered in their own bodily fluids. This wasn’t a loss; this was an embarrassment.

This game didn’t so much reveal Canberra’s limitations but revel in them, taunting them like they were Springfielders. At every step the Raiders did the opposite of the smart thing, playing with the discipline of a sugar-addled toddler with a pack of crayons and a wall in need of a masterpiece. Fifteen errors, seven penalties conceded, three blown tries, and some plays so dumb that it’s hard to give you a metaphor without feeling like I’m being mean. It was stupefying.

‘Regular’ dumb things, like giving away late-set penalties (like Danny Levi, Morgan Smithies, and Joe Tapine) were compounded by galling defensive errors (like Xavier Savage and Jordan Rapana both somehow fumbling the same kick, or Kaeo Weekes forgetting to tackle Helium Luki). Good position was wasted by passes both pushed (like Rapa to Timoko), hard to take (like Hudson Young to Rapa on a pop-pass in the line in the second half, or Rapa to Hudson Young off a break in the second) and cold dropped (hello Kaeo Weekes, Joe Tapine).

And just when you thought the Raiders couldn’t do anything dumber they went and upped the ante. Kaeo Weekes threw a pass into the ground that Savage picked up, ran backwards, passed to no one and turned over possession 30 plus metres backwards from the attacking set they were running. With three tackles and a minute before halftime Young grubbered for no one, to a space there was only ever going to be North Queenslanders, and gave the opposition a seven-tackle set, a field goal shot, instead of taking a breath and seeing if Canberra could find a better option on one of the next two tackles. Rapana took a tap on a penalty from his own 40 when his team desperately needed the rest and position a kick for touch would have garnered. Mistakes were made. Hearts were broken. Brains were dormant.

All these things compounded. You can outrun the occasional rush of blood but this was more a way of life. A structure. It was so constant it seemed like a belief system. You could control the railways and the flow of commerce on the Raiders error rate. And it cost the Raiders. The first try came from the aforementioned double error from Savage and Rapana but it also started with a helpful penalty. You’ll remember the second try for Weekes holding nothing but his manhood as Luki ran through the line, but it also started with a late-set penalty. The third try came after the Cows were in position to score because Weekes kicked the ball dead off the restart after the second try. When it ended with ‘just’ Jeremiah Nani beating Savage to the ball it was a relief that was actual regular good play.

The fourth try, however was a culmination of all that the previous errors caused. By this stage the middle had been defending so long they were cooked, and the Cows were simply rolling down the field, one-pass wide of the ruck for an easy sixty metres a set. Canberra had wasted their chance for a rest just prior when Jordy had seen the choice of ‘rest and reset’ or ‘rush of blood’ after a penalty and chosen with his heart. After the Raiders set North Queensland rolled back into attacking position, forced a repeat set, forced another, gave up another six when a grubber hit legs, and eventually scored when a floating pass found Kyle fucking Feldt, who admittedly did an excellent job to finish the movement.

By this stage it was 22-0 and with a cooked middle and seemingly no actual plan of attack, the game felt lost. It was only 28 minutes old. The Cows would only score twice more for the next sixty minutes but by that stage the margin was only a matter for points differential.

To say it was frustrating understates the situation. Canberra weren’t actually proving incapable in defence. They were down by 20 but had less missed tackles and more line breaks than their opposition. They’d gotten close to scoring three times but failed to get any. On one occasion their defence held out for three goal-line sets against a very good attack. But it couldn’t survive a fourth, and the Milk couldn’t offer enough in attack to cover the gap. Instead they were punishing themselves like St Jerome with a fetish.

The attack, like every other facet of the game, was hamstrung by the team’s folly. The middle, starved of possession, had to fight hard to win a ruck and as such metres and quick rucks became hard to come by. It wasn’t until the second half that Joe Tapine (11 for 172m) was consistently bending the line. Josh Papalii continues to impress in the second unit, either poking his head through the tackle or finding an offload on seemingly every carry. But he simply did not get enough opportunities because of the idiocy of the rest of the team. Even the back five, normally such a useful source of broken tackles and quick rucks, had a tough time. Matty Timoko only had 120 metres. X barely cracked 100. It was a constant battle in contact. And too often errors resulted.

The difficulty in creating momentum in the set meant the Raiders had to keep forcing the ball into the middle to try and earn the right to spread, a catch-22 that allowed the relatively fresh Cowboy middles to get physical with them, meaning they found it hard to move wide. Then when they did shift there was no space to operate, and passes hit line runners at the same time as defenders, and errors resulted. Or ball runners had to take the line on themselves, vainly hoping they could beat the opposition themselves.

Of course this wasn’t just all caused by the game situation. It was also built into the plan. In attacking sets the Raiders routinely took three or four tackles of crash balls before they got the ball to a half. Levi is only doing what every hooker in the Stuart era has done before him, only without the guile or deception that allows it to have an impact beyond the one-on-one. The truism is that you need to win the middle before you can shift. But no other team spends so much time making sure.

Often Jordan Rapana took the ball at first receiver, an adjustment Canberra have leaned into in order to get Ethan Strange and Kaeo Weekes the ball a pass wider with more space to move. But it also mean that when they get there they have less options, because there’s no one sitting as the second man behind the play. It means on the odd occasion they do throw a proper shift it takes on the appearance of a bucket brigade trying to put out a fire, slowly shifting side to side. There’s no change of direction, or angled line, outside of what is offered by the person with the ball. Teams can simply man up, taking what is offered at face value.

So then it lies on Ethan Strange, or Kaeo Weekes, or Rapana to make something happen from sheer will, or of course the old chaos. Strange looked dangerous taking on the line, and isolated Rapana on a defender for the Raiders first try. Weekes did similarly, and isolated Elliott Whitehead on Val Holmes for another score. Seb Kris’ short-side pop-and-pass to Savage was a well worked move. Those moments were beyond too little too late. It almost felt frustrating because each underscored just how poor the Cowboys defence is when tested with anything remotely sophisticated.

It’s a problem borne from the unique mix of personnel and policy. Strange keeps impressing but is constantly trying to make things happen without the structure aiding him. Weekes is similarly doing his best but bereft of options outside of making things happen himself. The longer the season goes on the more it feels like Jordy is trying to do too much, no doubt a consequence of not enough being done. A similar critique can be offered of Hudson Young, who apart from playing himself out of an Origin jersey in this game, spent his time doing all the things he shouldn’t and not enough of the things he should.

If only there was a better way. An obvious solution is the return of Jamal Fogarty, which will allow a bit more width without bringing Jordan in from the jockey position. A returning Corey Horsburgh could help too, bringing a useful connection pass through the middle third, especially given Morgan Smithies’ skills in this regard seem frequently overwhelmed recently. Tom Starling will likely miss a game after failing his Head Injury Assessment during this game – that could mean either Zac Woolford, Adrian Trevilyan or Hohepa Puru finally get a run in the top line. All three could add more width and relieve pressure on Weekes, Strange and Rapa. But alas the more likely outcome is more Levi, and more head-ramming into the middle of the ground like we trying to invade a castle. Huzzah.

The good thing here is that while Canberra beat themselves, it’s a pretty easy fix. This wasn’t the stylistic capitulation I had feared. Their edges held up for the most part. They didn’t lose the middle until their ineptitude and ill-discipline lost it for them. If not for the cavalcade of incapability they could have competed. All they need to do is be less dumb. It’s not that hard, right?

But even with that their structural problems will remain. They’ll continue needing to redline their way to victory. There’s no margin for error in that pathway, a situation only made more clear by the cost of their error-ridden approach in this game. There’s a better way to play, and Canberra have done that this season. But it seems until key personnel return that will remain a memory.

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